Friday, May 17, 2013

Star Trek: Into Darkness Leaves A Waxy Residue On My Imax 3D Glasses

Star Trek Crew in new movie
The new Star Trek crew in the movies
Original Star Trek Crew Made of Wax
Original Star Trek crew made out of wax

Star Trek: Into Darkness leaves a waxy residue on my IMAX 3D glasses. I'll tell you why.

J.J. Abrams has openly admitted that he did not grow up a Star Trek fan. He is in fact a Star Wars fan. So much so that he now has an opportunity to direct the new Star Wars movie, which is now owned by Disney.

J.J. Abrams created a CGI heavy movie (I call it waxy) that is full of non-stop action. But if you actually stop to think about some of the things going on, you might feel a little overwhelmed by the preposterous unbelievably ridiculousness of it all. It is all a wax illusion of Star Trek, but the heart of Star Trek is just not there. The Imax 3D  does not fool me with all the pretty scenery of red forests and shiny ships. 

After reading countless movie reviews for Star Trek: Into Darkness, I'm tired of hearing the same nonsense over and over again. All of these reviews say how wonderful the movie is because J.J. Abrams was not a Trekkie and has no attachment to the franchise. I wonder about these critics.

Any reviewer that says a movie is awesome, but does not connect to it in an emotional way should not be reviewing movies.

I've talked with many Star Trek fans, and they are upset about the new movie. It is a re-hash of stale formulas, and the story has so many plot holes that it can't hold water.

Surprises in Star Trek: Into Darkness:

  1. Kirk dies. Not Spock. Yeah yeah, I know this is a new timeline.
  2. Kirk is revived with Khan's blood. Umm, why does Khan's blood have resurrecting powers?
  3. Khan does not die in the end. He is merely captured and put in Warehouse 31.
  4. Christopher Pike dies in Star Trek: Into Darkness. Didn't see that coming.
  5. Former Robocop (Peter Weller) is a crooked Admiral and dies in the movie.
  6. Spock falls into an active volcano and survives
  7. Khan beams from Earth to Qo'nos. Isn't that a far distance to beam by teleporter?
  8. There is only one man guarding the bad Dreadnaut ship. What is this, Austin Powers?
  9. Lastly, Spock feels the need to mind meld with Christopher Pike before he dies. That's just plain morbid. (See secret pictures below from the first J.J. Abrams Star Trek movie)
Kirk talking to Spock in cave in first Star Trek movie
Christopher Pike being tortured by Nero
Spock wants to feel Christopher Pike's pain

Ultimately, die hard fans of Star Trek are upset by J.J. Abrams choice of a weak storyline.

Most critics do point out that the acting is good, especially the part of Khan played by Benedict Cumberbatch. 

I too, am a fan of Sherlock, played by Benedict Cumberbatch, but I am an even bigger Star Trek fan.

You know, I get excited just thinking about how the new Star Trek movie would introduce the Klingons. After you meet them in Star Trek: Into Darkness, you feel like they aren't the warriors that the shows portrayed them as. I think he is going for the surprise factor when the guy removes his Roman soldier-esque helmet, and a Klingon is revealed.

Where are their Birds of Prey? Where are their warrior suits?

This is the introduction of the Klingons in this version of the reboot, since they didn't make the cut in the last movie.

Klingons are supposed to be big and bad, not defenseless and sad. Not in my world, anyways, but in J.J. Abrams world, they are not even the Klingons we know and love.

And with that, I make my case.

Opening Image credit: Flickr Creative Commons; by JoshBerglund19

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