Immigration Problem Solved: 5 Ways To Stop An Alien Takeover

Alien artwork by Didier Konings

Illegal aliens and the immigration laws are all over the news. It's a hot-button topic in political circles with a general election coming up.

But domestic aliens are less invasive than aliens that attack from outer space.

So take a moment to consider the real threat of an alien takeover, and how you can prepare yourself, with some help from popular Hollywood films.

5 Ways to Stop an Alien Takeover:

1. Use knowledge gained about the aliens to take the upper hand. In The Darkest Hour (2011), Emile Hirsch plays a young entrepreneur that is taken surprise by invisible aliens that attempt a worldwide takeover. These electric emitting aliens can only by fought with microwave guns (that a brilliant Russian creates on a whim), and a little American ingenuity. In Cowboys and Aliens (2011), Jake (Daniel Craig) wakes up with amnesia and a high-tech blaster sealed to his wrist. Aliens attack and cowboys must team up with indians to ward off the gold-hungry aliens. Ella (Olivia Wilde) turns out to be a friendly alien, and they all learn the hard way that a bow-and-arrow is useless when fighting alien immigrants from outer space. They have no intention of learning English, despite working in a U.S. gold mine. A laser gun and a little dynamite works a lot better.
2. Run and let the angry birds do the fighting with biological warfare. In War of the Worlds (2005), the humans are ineffective against the alien invasion, however the bird flu is what sends the aliens packing. Look, if the birds of planet Earth want to fight for us, why stop them? Its about time they pull their weight.
   Note: This has nothing whatsoever to do with Angry Birds in Space.
3. Let the friendly aliens fight for you. In The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008), an alien friendly comes to Earth to prevent the G.O.R.T. robot from wiping out humanity altogether. If Keanu Reeves is on your side, who can be against you? Or how about in Transformers (2007) when friendly robots come from outer space to help defend Earth from the power-hungry robots that want use Earth for a new home?
4. Take an alien fighter ship and take revenge. In Independence Day (1996), aliens attempt a worldwide takeover, and an American fighter pilot – played by Will Smith – takes one of the alien ships back to the Mother ship and takes a surprise with him to blow them into oblivion.
5. Find an intergalactic Stargate and lead a ground-based rebellion against the alien threat. In Stargate (1994), Kurt Russell plays an army Colonel with a mission to destroy the gateway between planets to protect Earth. Unfortunately, he finds that the alien enemy must be stopped by blowing up the Pyramid-like spaceship first.

If you think you can add to this list, feel free to leave a comment at the bottom.

Men in Black 3 is Going Where Star Trek & Stargate Have Already Ventured: The Past

Men in Black 3 logo

Men in Black 3 (MIB3) is daring to go where Star Trek and Stargate have already ventured - into time travel, coupled with the fascination of aliens. Warning: Spoilers ahead!

Is this formula of Aliens + Time Travel getting old yet?

Star Trek: Spock's ship that went through time

Some could argue that it has already been done in the Star Trek and Stargate franchises and we don't need more franchises going in this direction.

Do movie-goers want to see Agent J (played by Will Smith) in this new scenario?

Yes.

Will Smith holding intergalactic guns

Agent K (formerly played by Tommy Lee Jones, now played by Josh Brolin), has to be found in the past by Agent J (Will Smith). Agent K has to go to the past one day before he is killed by an alien so he can bring him up to speed on his future self and role in the timeline. Otherwise, Boris the Animal will kill young Agent K, which would stop Boris the Animal from going to jail in the future. You also get to meet Agent W (played by Bill Hader of SNL).

I think this movie adds a creative storyline to the MIB franchise, despite the Aliens + time travel re-hash, and am willing to give this movie a chance before judging it by its cover.

Star Trek (2009) has already changed its timeline by altering the past. This could prove disasterous, or successful, depending on where writers Roberto Orci and Alex Kurtzman go with the new Star Trek storyline.

The trailer for Men In Black 3 can be viewed here.

These science-fiction shows either used used time travel or alternate realities:
Fringe - Alternate reality
Star Trek: Deep Space Nine - Time travel and alternate reality
Sliders - Alternate realities
Terra Nova - Time travel and alternate realities

Men in Black III made $54,592,779 on its opening weekend, and worldwide earned $621,568,042 according to IMDB.com.

Indiana Jones Versus Pirates of the Caribbean: Should There Be a Fifth Movie?

Recently, a friend posted on Facebook about his dislike for the Pirates franchise, and how they better not be making a 5th movie. I replied to the effect that the same should hold true to the Indiana Jones franchise. I thought the last Indiana Jones movie was not only horrible, but it also stole the plot from Stargate: SG1.

To read more about this, see my earlier blog post, found here.

Basically, The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull was a let down, because it used some cheesy jeep driving-on-the-edge-of-the-cliff CGI, Indy jumping into a lead fridge to survive a nuke, and had to incorporate aliens into the movie, rather than have Indiana Jones go on a real adventure. Don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with using aliens, if done right. Stargate: SG-1 did a good job with aliens.

 A Crystal Skull, like in Indiana Jones 4

Indiana Jones 4 did not stay true to the franchise, and did not convince me that it is worthy of a 5th movie.

Now, to be fair, Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End was my least favorite movie of this franchise, because it had the giant CGI Calypso wreaking havoc while the two ships fought while spinning inside of a whirlpool. It was not believable, and definitely not cool.



Pirate ships swirling around in Calypso's bathwater

So, opinions aside, let's let the numbers do the talking. I did this side-by-side comparison of the two franchises, and guess which franchise wins when you compare the ticket sales at the box office?

Pirates of the Caribbean, hands down.

Indiana Jones vs. Pirates of the Caribbean franchise statistics

I am not against Disney making a Pirates of the Caribbean Part 5. But I am totally against a 5th Indiana Jones movie. Yes, the last one was that bad.

If you want to know the real problem with Hollywood and movie sequels these days, read my Yahoo! Voices article, found here.

Indiana Jones 4 & The Stolen Crystal Skull from Stargate:SG1

Summary: Indiana Jones 4 stole the Crystal Skull plot from Stargate: SG1. It is a sad day in Hollywood when original stories cannot be made into film. Instead, old ideas from other franchises are re-hashed into movies for the sake of seeing old actors come back one more time.

Shia LaBeouf said this about Indiana Jones 4: "I feel like I dropped the ball on the legacy that people loved and cherished...You get to monkey-swinging and things like that and you can blame it on the writer and you can blame it on Steven [Spielberg]. But the actor's job is to make it come alive and make it work, and I couldn't do it. So that's my fault. Simple."

Indiana Jones 4

Have you ever gone to a movie theater to see something you were excited to see, only to be let down with a ridiculous story, or unbelievable action scenes throughout the movie?  I have.  And without naming any names (see picture above), it seems to happen more often than not.

Indiana Jones 4 left a bad taste in my mouth. Worse than throw up. Maybe because the storyline was stolen, and doesn't work for the Indiana Jones franchise.

Please note that I was already a fan of the first three Indiana Jones movies.  But when you put  all four movies side-by-side, and compare them, one of them is not like the others. Indiana Jones 4 was horrible!

But before dissing Indiana Jones 4 any further, let me point out something that most people are not aware of.  The whole Crystal Skull story was already used.

And this is how I know.  My wife and I are watching Stargate: SG1 at home, and we are in Season 3, episode 21.  Guess what the title of this episode is?  Crystal Skull.  And as we are watching, I scratch my head, because something about this episode is eerily familiar. Basically the whole premise of searching for a Crystal Skull that was placed there by an alien race.

Haven't seen the epsiode?  Buy the complete season on DVD.

Stargate SG1: Season 3 Complete Set

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Stargate SG1: Season 3, Episode 21 "Crystal Skull"
In episode 21, Daniel Jackson comes across a Crystal Skull that does something magical (but explained by the physics and science in the show), which transports him to another plane of existence where the other team members cannot see him.  Fast forward to the end, and they are standing in front of the Crystal Skull, which is connected to an alien race that has placed it there so they can be contacted.  Sound familiar?

Daniel Jackson finds the Crystal Skull

So the episode ends and my mind brings me back to that awful movie that we all know to be Indiana Jones 4.  And this seriously bothered me.

So today, I emailed the writer of SG1, episode 21, and asked him if he received any credit from Indiana Jones 4 (2008) after coming up with the original idea in the year 2000.  He graciously confirmed that he did not because, "that's Hollywood!"  Personally, I wouldn't want to be connected to that movie either, if I was in his shoes.  But it just goes to show that it doesn't pay to steal ideas (plagiarize) and try to label them as fresh and original.

Instead of Harrison Ford reveling in a quadrilogous victory, he will forever be running from the Crystal alien Skull. Somebody should tell him that it was stolen from an Stargate:SG1 storyline.